[Real]

This is how I know it's real. I can't stop. Thinking about him, kissing him, wanting to see him. But it never gets painful. I find pleasure in the small things I get from him. This is how relationships should be. There's no pressure, no requirements, no nothing. It's not about how often I get to see him, or for how long. It's not weather we're alone or with other people. It's being with him at all. It's putting aside the differences, and loving that person with their flaws. That's what a real relationship is. It's not needing them to be happy. It's wanting them because they make you happy. It's not needing to tell or show the world. It's knowing what's there, and being able to reserve it for you and that other person. It's not being afraid of what that person thinks. It's about doing what will make you both happy, not just one of you. It's about showing you care, but not feeling pressured. It's not having to go to extremes to show affection. It's enjoying small, short, sweet moments for long periods of time. It's about giving support when life gets rough. It's about showing your vulnerable side and allowing that person to help. It's about trusting another human being with your everything, and taking care of someone else's everything. Real relationships are a lot of things. Abused is one of them. Hard to come by is another. People think they have what's real, when in reality, its all the honeymoon stage, and sooner or later, that relationship will fall apart because they don't know what's important. I can't be sure if what I have is real quite yet, since it's only been a week. It feels a lot longer than that thought. Life is pretty crappy right now, and I'm losing a lot. But knowing I have him there no matter what is what gets me through the day. I still have him, and a few other friends even if the rest are ditching me for the stupidest reasons. Hiding what's here would be pointless and painful, even though there's a seven year age difference, but mentally, him and I are only exact same page. I'm too mature for where I am, and I'm lucky I've found a person like him who understands everything I go through, and agrees with everything I say because it's what he thinks, not because he wants to be on my good side. He makes he happy. I don't miss him much when I don't see him all week, because I don't need to. I'm stable, he's stable. We're both happy, and we talk all the time. Seeing him every day would wear out his welcome, so these weekly visits keep things interesting.